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Five Things Not to Do/Say to a Pregnant Woman

8/23/2017

 
​So someone you know tells you she is pregnant. Yay! Congratulations! Woohoo there's another human coming into the world! While it can be very exciting and you want to ask ALL THE QUESTIONS and give all your advice and say all the things - there are some things you just shouldn't say to a pregnant woman. 

Pregnancy hormones are no joke. You don't feel like yourself, it's possible you're feeling nauseated most of the day, and you're feeling a little like a beached whale. Your organs are being pushed out of place, you can't control your bladder, and you're feeling extra protective of the little life inside of you. So even if said comment or question isn't really meant to be offensive, pregnant women are on edge all the time, and any one or all of the above factors can contribute to her getting upset over a comment that is made. But these? 

These are typically the worst offenders. They come from friends, family, and strangers alike, and they can ruffle the feathers of even the most chill pregnant women. So next time someone tells you they are pregnant, avoid these actions/statements. 
  1. Touching a pregnant woman's belly. I always say, "If you didn't put it there, don't touch it." Unless a pregnant women tells you it's okay to touch her belly, IT IS NOT OKAY to touch a woman's stomach when you haven't been invited to. When I was pregnant with Caleb, this didn't bother me. But this time around, I don't feel like being touched. Alternatives: None. Just don't do it. 
  2. "I hope it's a girl/boy!" I get it. People want to make conversation. They don't mean any harm by it. But all I care about is that this baby is healthy and whole and that I am healthy. I will not love this child any more whether it is a male or female, and I don't think that one sex or the other will more fully complete my family. In the Hispanic culture it's so desirable to have "la parejita" - a boy and a girl. But I also see the positives of having two children of the same sex. Either way, this child will be so loved. I almost don't even mind not knowing and I really think I could wait until the baby is born to find out (still working on the hubs on this one!). Alternatives: "I'll hope for a great pregnancy and a happy and healthy baby." or "Everyone is so excited to see what this little one will look like!" 
  3. "You're really big!" or any variation of this, including, "You must be about to pop!" or "Are you sure there's not more than one in there?" Just. Don't. We already feel uncomfortable about our bodies, everything is changing, including things we never dreamed of, and here you are, telling us we look huge. Why, thank you. Next time I see you I'll be sure to ask you when you're due, too. Oh, you're not pregnant? Sorry, not sorry... Alternatives: "You look beautiful," "Your belly is perfect," and if you really want to win points, "Wow you're not showing much at all!"
  4. "You should really be careful with..." Our obstetricians give us a gigantic list of things we can and cannot do. We are already feeling semi-deprived of wine, sushi, and some of our favorite cheeses. Don't start telling us all these made up wives tales about not going out in the eclipse and not using knives and all this craziness! And don't judge her if she does have a glass of wine - odds are her doctor cleared it and that's the one glass she is drinking all week! Alternatives: "Is there anything I can get for you?" "What would you like for dinner tonight?" 
  5. Horror stories about some acquaintance during their pregnancy. I know. People want to be relatable and they want to tell their cautionary tales. But no pregnant woman needs to hear about your friend of a friend who threw up every day of her pregnancy until the day she gave birth. Alternatives: "You're going to be feeling better in no time," or "Is there anything I can help you with?" 

You're welcome in advance for helping you avoid a sty in your eye - you know, one of those old wives tales. ;)

xoxo, 

​Jenise

Baby #2: A Happy Surprise!

8/21/2017

 
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On Friday, we made a big announcement on social media. We are joyously awaiting our second little blessing! Finding out was a surprise, to say the least, and to tell you the truth, I didn't really believe I was pregnant until I had been to more than one ultrasound. I guess because we had struggled so much to get pregnant with Caleb, it was just surreal. 

Last summer, we went to see our reproductive endocrinologist (aka fertility doctor) in the hopes of getting the process started for baby #2. Since Zika was a huge concern last summer and we had a trip to the Dominican Republic, he told us to come back in January. So in January, we went to see him. After going back and forth for a little bit, I told Eddie I didn't think it was the right time. He was in the middle of a transition with his job, and I felt like the added stress of having a baby wasn't something we needed at the moment. So we decided to hold off. 

We went about our lives and figured we would come back to the doctor sometime in the fall after Caleb had started preschool. In June, my husband's work situation got resolved, we spent nearly 3 weeks at the beach, and then I went to BlogHer. We also booked a trip to Napa for the first weekend of August. A couple of weeks later, I realized my period was 4 days late. I didn't think much of it since I don't have totally regular cycles. But four days after that, I figured I should probably take a test, especially since we had weekend plans that involved drinking. 

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw that there were two blue lines less than ten seconds after I peed on that little stick. I took two more tests just to be sure, then ran and got some bloodwork to confirm that I was, in fact, pregnant. Eddie was as shocked and as thrilled as I was.

My parents were out of town for three weeks in the month of July. I found out the Friday after they left, and we decided to hold off on telling anyone until they were back. We told my in-laws the night before my parents returned, and we surprised my parents at the airport with the news. Nobody was expecting it, and everyone is as surprised and ecstatic as we are!

I'll have a "bumpdate" for you in the next week or so and I'll let you know all about how I've been feeling, but for now, I'm feeling immeasurable joy at the fact that we are growing our little family! 

Caleb is excited about his baby brother or sister, too! 

xoxo, 

​Jenise

Back to School Must-Haves

8/11/2017

 
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To all my teacher friends - don't hate me for the reminder that summer is almost over. I remember being in your shoes. 

In two short weeks, Caleb will be starting preschool for the first time ever! It's a half day program, but it's at a school that goes from preschool through 8th grade, which means it functions similarly to a regular school. 

I like to be prepared early, so back in early July I made sure to take care of all his supplies so that I wasn't running around in the mad rush during the few weeks before school. Here's a list of what I picked up for him. Items may vary depending on your child's age and what their school requires, but I think across the board you'll find that most kids need similar items.  

  1. School Supplies (from the school's list) - Caleb's school actually works with School Tool Box,  a company that send the supplies out all packaged up. They will even send directly to the school so you don't have to worry about it, but I missed the cutoff date for that because mombrain. I might have been able to save some money by doing the shopping on my own, but for every box they sell they donate meals to starving children, so I figured it was a great cause. 
  2. Backpack - When I asked for recommendations, everyone - and I mean everyone recommended Pottery Barn Kids. I wasn't particularly sold on them because I didn't want Caleb to have the same backpack as half of the other kids in school. After a little more research, I decided to go with Herschel. They have a modern twist on a classic style, and they had really cute color and pattern combinations. I decided to go with the smallest of the styles because Caleb won't be napping in school and doesn't need tons of stuff in there. 
  3. Lunchbox - Herschel didn't have one to match the backpack I picked out, so I went online to L.L. Bean and picked out a basic one. But I know their stuff is great quality and will last. I also picked up this BentGo Box (affiliate link) on Amazon. I ended up getting the L.L. Bean bag afterwards because the BentGo Box doesn't have a handle. But I love that it seals the food in has several different compartments, so I can put stuff like hummus or yogurt in there and it won't spill out. 
  4. Uniforms - Caleb's uniforms this year are really easy - just shorts and a t-shirt that has the school's logo on it. 
  5. Sneakers - The only requirement for shoes for Caleb is that they be Velcro sneakers. So we went to Nordstrom during their sale and picked up these Nikes, as well as a pair of Adidas in a larger size so that he has shoes for the next few months. 
  6. Back to School Sign - I wanted something a little different, and that I could use for several years. I ended up picking up this chalkboard at the Target Bullseye Playground one day and thought it was perfect. I personalized it with chalk markers and bam! We have our back to school sign!
  7. Labels - I was planning on having Caleb's name or initials embroidered on all his belongings (clothing, backpack, etc.), but a friend of mine told me about Sticky Monkey Labels. They go right on the clothing labels, lunch boxes, cups, etc, and they don't come off in the wash or in the dishwasher. I'll definitely keep you posted as to how they hold up during the school year! 

I think that's everything! Are you ready to start the school year with your little ones? 

xoxo, 

​Jenise
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